Hervé Léger Arrives in the Mail

. 2 min read

Remember me saying I had ordered a 790-dollar dress and was speculating if my subconscious, fearing life, would allow me to like the dress at all?

Well, my subconscious was cunning as hell. It made me google the brand, which made me realize the dress I had ordered was a bandage dress, which made me think I had ordered a trashy dress, which made me hate the idea of ever wearing it - regardless of the fact that I didn't know how the dress would look like on me, and regardless of the fact that it looked perfectly elegant and not at all trashy on the model in the online store.

So, when the dress arrived in the mail, I was so ready to hate it.

I got the box from the post office, brought it home, opened it, and there it was.

A bright red Hervé Léger. Christmas red. I'll look like a Christmas ornament, I thought to myself. Just like I imagined!

I put the dress on. It fit like a glove. It hugged my body, just like bandage dresses do, but it didn't look distasteful. It wasn't too short, and it didn't show cleavage. If anything, it squeezed my chest down two cup sizes.

I tried to hate it. I noticed the back was sticking out, but that was solved by quickly fixing the position of the sleeves. I put on my silver jewelry and noticed that the shade of red clashed with them... but red lipstick, in the exact Christmas red shade as the dress, brought the whole look together. I loved the way the dress gave me a waist. I loved the way it made me look... elegant. Affluent. Expensive.

But it was still a bandage dress.

And it still clashed with my silver jewelry.

Would I wear it more than once?

In the same package were two other red dresses, each about 35 dollars. One I thought was beyond classy and elegant but was told I looked like a grandma in it. Another was a knit dress that showed my body beautifully without clinging to my body or being trashy. It was also a more cool shade of red than the other two, prompting me to think it'd go better with my jewelry.

Needless to say I'll definitely keep at least the latter.

...but what about the Hervé? Should I keep it just because it would force me to go outside my comfort zone (fear-of-life-wise)?

Or should I return it and find a similarly priced dress, one that is the right shade and less confusing for my subconscious (trashy-wise)?

(Do men have problems like this?)