Personality as a type of alcohol

. 2 min read

Here at WIP, we had an article about spirit animals a couple of weeks back - how you can find certain beneficial attributes in animals and use them to fortify your identity. Well, guess what? Animals aren't the only subject in which there are psychological characteristics to identify with. Another place where you can find yourself is, quite surprisingly, alcohol.

While I'm not advocating the overconsumption of alcohol (and yet have mentioned it's one way to bring momentary depth to your philosophical thinking), I've come to notice that different kinds of alcohol have, for the lack of a better word, personalities, and you can use those personalities to build your own character. You can change the person you are by identifying with a specific drink, and even more by consuming that drink. Here's my interpretation of different types of alcohol.

Ciders and long drinks are carefree souls who like all things light and fun. They are full of joy and have the ability to laugh at all jokes, no matter how bad they are. They like company and are often the entertainers.

Beers are casual, they like to just hang out instead of attending a party with a lot of people and loud noises. They prefer a poker night with a small group of friends. Lagers are wallflowers - they have little opinion about anything and instead agree with everyone else; ales are more civilized and like to take their time to enjoy the little things in life; and stouts are unyielding in their views.

Spirits are all about the yolo attitude. Why worry about tomorrow, when we have tonight? Above all else, they want to make good memories, regardless of if it requires them to make fools of themselves. They live for parties and the weekend and have the most difficult time trying to cope with the perceived mediocrity of their everyday lives.

Red wines are intellectuals. They like to discuss politics, art, and culture in good company, preferably over dinner with friends and aquaintances. They like to impress, yet are unsure of the reasons. They often think too much of themselves.

White wines are often perceived as those who would like to join the red wine party but never get the invitation because the red wines think of them as embarrassing, lame wannabes. The white wines themselves know who they are, though. They are perfectly happy with themselves, or with other white wines; in reality, they aren't interested in joining the red wine supper. They have their own ideas.

Champagne and sparking wines are like ciders, but with class. They want to enjoy life to the fullest but want to do it without losing their public image. Their lives dulls down easily, though - the little things quickly lose their magic, and bigger things must be brought in to keep them content.

Whiskeys mean business. Their life is difficult, and they must fight every day to be pleased with themselves, but they enjoy every minute of it. They work hard and play hard; they have strong opinions; some of them are ruthless in their self-interest. They're not afraid to speak their minds when it's due.

(You can have a different view. What matters is what you think.)

Which of these sounds like something you are, and which sounds like something you want to become? Decide on the best, and start enjoying the drink. Some of those attributes might start rubbing onto you.